Frodo and Sam stranded on Mount Doom following air traffic control glitch grounding all eagles
by Nathan Cowley 2 months ago 
Frodo Baggins and his companion Samwise Gamgee are currently stranded on the side of Mount Doom after an air traffic control glitch grounded eagles across Middle-earth.
Having destroyed the One Ring, the Hobbits were hoping to catch their scheduled 7:30PM flight back to the Shire, but were furious to find out a technical problem affecting air traffic control meant they’d have to spend another night in Mordor.
“This is the second time in two weeks,” said a furious Samwise Gamgee, surrounded by lava.
“All we want to do is go home. We’ve walked about 1,700 miles to this stupid volcano, and now we find out all the eagles are grounded because of some bloody glitch. It’s ridiculous. Honestly, Middle-earth has gone to the dogs.
“And if spending the last six months with this whiny little bitch wasn’t enough, now I’ve got to spend another night with him. ‘Carry my bags, Sam. Cook my dinner, Sam. Don’t worry, Sam. We can trust Smeagol.’ He’s a fucking prick, and I can’t wait to get away from the guy.
“I don’t care what it takes. I just want a giant eagle right now. I don’t care what kind of eagle. Any giant eagle will do. Okay, maybe not a Ryanair eagle. But any other eagles would be great.”
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