Sports

Sports news from NewsThump.com – bringing you the latest from the world of sport, updated every second.

Team INEOS to demonstrate green credentials by recycling jiffy bags

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Bosses of Britain’s top cycling team have reassured environmental campaigners they plan to prove their green credentials by recycling jiffy bags.

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Durham County Cricket appoint Skeletor as ‘sporting consultant’

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Durham have dropped a second major bombshell in the space of 24 hours by appointing Skeletor to advise on ‘all cricket-related operations’.

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Scotland loses to Borat

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Scotland has slipped to a humiliating defeat in the Euro2020 qualifiers to a man in a green mankini.

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Aston Villa’s Jack Grealish relieved that Birmingham City fans punch like little girls

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Aston Villa captain Jack Grealish has spoken of his relief that Birmingham City fans punch with all the strength of a pre-pubescent girl, after he was attacked from behind but still able to go on to score the winner.

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Duckworth-Lewis Amendment will see UK enter permanent customs union if it’s raining on March 29th

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The Duckworth-Lewis Amendment to the Brexit Withdrawal Agreement, to be voted on in parliament this week, will see the UK enter a permanent customs union with the EU if it is raining on March 29th.

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Anti-Brexit supporters inspired by Chelsea goalkeeper may just refuse to leave EU

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Anti-Brexit campaigners watching yesterday’s league cup final have found themselves inspired by Kepa Arrizabalaga’s refusal to abide by a decision he disagreed with, and his choice to stay inside the field of play.

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‘Jesus Saves’ posters to be removed across the world, after he discovers he’s no match for Gordon Banks

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Gordon Banks glided through the Pearly Gates today and has already demoted Jesus to the second-best saver, after making a brief appearance in the Paradise reserve team.

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Drastic drop in living standards is a price Brexiteers are happy for you to pay

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A recent IPSOS poll on British attitudes towards Brexit reveal that most leavers are quite content to see you lose your job, your children’s opportunities for the future or even your home in order to separate themselves from the EU.

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Equine flu far more severe for stallions than for fillies

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The virulent strain of equine flu which has disrupted the racing calendar this week is far more debilitating and unpleasant for stallions than it is for their female counterparts, according to a leading vet today.

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Wimpy version of rugby over for another year

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The Superbowl has finished, apparently.

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