Sports

Sports news from NewsThump.com – bringing you the latest from the world of sport, updated every second.

Manchester United to feed more successful teams’ cats during European finals

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Manchester United are to feed the cats while Arsenal, Tottenham, Liverpool and Chelsea are all away playing in some important football matches.

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Man wondering if he can talk about Fight Club yet

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51-year-old Simon Williams is wondering if he can talk about Fight Club yet, we can confirm.

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Jurgen Klopp asked if he fancies having a go at managing Brexit

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Liverpool manager Jurgen Klopp has been approached about the possibility of taking over the management of Brexit, after demonstrating an uncanny ability to turn utterly hopeless no-win situations into glorious victories.

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Tottenham Hotspur medics criticised for telling Theon Greyjoy to ‘run it off’

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Tottenham Hotspur medics have been criticised after urging Theon Greyjoy to ‘play on’ following his ‘unfortunate collision’ with the Night King.

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World Championship Snooker to launch replica kits

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The Snooker World Championship will aim to emulate the cynical money-making of the Champions League with the introduction of multiple replica kits.

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Man who ran marathon dressed as Big Ben forced to stop at finish line for four years of repairs

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The marathon runner dressed as Big Ben was forced to stop before the finish line and undertake four years of repairs.

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London marathon runners endure 26 miles of properties they could never, ever afford

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Tens of thousands of runners have today endured 26 miles of properties they will never, ever be able to afford.

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Roy Keane to play villain in new James Bond film

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Manchester United legend Roy Keane will play a villain in the 25th official James Bond film, producers have announced.

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Eric Cantona left disappointed as nobody seems keen on his offer of an omelette

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Guests staying with Eric Cantona have insisted that they’d be happy with cornflakes for breakfast and there is really no need to go to the trouble of making everyone an omelette.

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Joey Barton and Barnsley manager clash over Kant’s categorical imperative

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Fleetwood Town FC manager and Renaissance man, Joey Barton, has come to blows with rival boss, Daniel Stendel, over the controversial philosophy of eighteenth-century German thinker, Immanuel Kant, it has been revealed.

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