The Conservative party has insisted that prime minister Boris Johnson has no intention of asking the EU for a Brexit extension, despite legally being required to do so, because obeying the law is for pussies.
Woman puzzled as to why husband keeps dressing children like twats
A mother of two can’t work out why her husband insists on putting clothes on their kids which make them look like they’ve escaped from the circus.
Extinction Rebellion smash up a wind farm
Extinction Rebellion have stepped up their campaign against things that they really should be in favour of by smashing up a wind farm.
Facebook CEO Mark Zuckerberg gave a speech yesterday in which he reiterated his company’s mission to fight fake news in all its forms, unless it is published by the people who run every country in the world.
A glass that the dishwasher refuses to clean properly will keep getting put back in until it’s either completely spotless or has been eroded into tiny grains of sand.
- Confused public now feeding ducks crisps, cheese-strings and crystal meth
- Labour warns MPs that voting for a Tory Brexit could result in Jeremy being very disappointed with them
- Arlene Foster: Make me a Royal and I’ll support Brexit deal
- Boris Johnson’s Brexit deal just Theresa May’s three rejected deals standing on each other’s shoulders wearing a trench coat
- London commuters delighted to take out permanent bad mood on some protesters
- Boris Johnson hails great new Brexit deal that will see UK ‘stay in the EU’
- Extinction Rebellion protestors won’t be happy until every single Londoner hates them
- UK proposes time-travelling Irish border that makes customs checks in the past
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Government struggling to get support of those MPs it told to ‘get f*cked’ five weeks ago
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