Thumbnail image for Brexiters who bought Nigel Farage condoms on promise of multiple sexual encounters left wanking into socks two years later

Brexiters who bought Nigel Farage condoms on promise of multiple sexual encounters left wanking into socks two years later

The Nigel Farage condom has proven to be the perfect metaphor for Brexit Britain, according to a study of the sort of people who actually buy such things.

Thumbnail image for Lying bastards furious at Emanuel Macron for pointing out that they are lying bastards

Lying bastards furious at Emanuel Macron for pointing out that they are lying bastards

The UK world of political fibbers erupted in fury as the French President broke protocol and openly highlighted the obvious truth that Brexit proponents were lying sacks of shit

The woman accusing Supreme Court nominee Bret Kavanaugh of attempting to sexually assault her when they were teenagers should have come forward in public sooner, according to the very people doing everything in their power to make her seem like a lying slut this morning.

On the eve of their party conference, Labour has announced a clear position on Brexit – they will support any Brexit deal that takes a harsh line with Israel.

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Sport

Thumbnail image for Burning your Nike trainers in protest ‘a great way to get out of going running’

Burning your Nike trainers in protest ‘a great way to get out of going running’

Local Man Simon Williams has used the outcry over Nike’s latest advert as an excuse to burn his trainers so he doesn’t have to go running any more.

Entertainment

Thumbnail image for Big Bird revealed as a foot fetishist

Big Bird revealed as a foot fetishist

Following speculation that Sesame Street characters Bert and Ernie might be a homosexual couple, it has now been claimed that Big Bird is sexually aroused by feet.

World

Thumbnail image for Why didn’t Kavanaugh’s accuser come forward sooner, ask people publicly suggesting she’s a lying slut

Why didn’t Kavanaugh’s accuser come forward sooner, ask people publicly suggesting she’s a lying slut

The woman accusing Supreme Court nominee Bret Kavanaugh of attempting to sexually assault her when they were teenagers should have come forward in public sooner, according to the very people doing everything in their power to make her seem like a lying slut this morning.

Technology

Thumbnail image for Satirical website discovers new way to stuff even more adverts onto the page

Satirical website discovers new way to stuff even more adverts onto the page

Popular satirical clickbait site FactPunch! has discovered some new and exciting methods to cram even more adverts onto their page, they have announced today.

Science

Thumbnail image for Students who bunked lectures during Homeopathy degree secure better marks than full attendees

Students who bunked lectures during Homeopathy degree secure better marks than full attendees

The University of Basingstoke has confirmed that the less often students turned up for classes on its new Homeopathy degree course, the higher the mark they got.

Education

Thumbnail image for Students who bunked lectures during Homeopathy degree secure better marks than full attendees

Students who bunked lectures during Homeopathy degree secure better marks than full attendees

The University of Basingstoke has confirmed that the less often students turned up for classes on its new Homeopathy degree course, the higher the mark they got.

Business

Thumbnail image for Fungi producers facing bankruptcy as everybody off mushrooms now

Fungi producers facing bankruptcy as everybody off mushrooms now

Some fungi producers have announced that they face bankruptcy as salacious revelations about Donald Trump’s penis has made everyone nauseous at the thought of mushrooms.