Science

New study reveals Chinese are just as good at whispering as anyone else

Thumbnail image for New study reveals Chinese are just as good at whispering as anyone else

Researchers have sent shockwaves around primary schools and playgroups by revealing that the Chinese are no better or worse at whispering than any other race.

Read the full article →

UK testing ‘Megalabs’ will only be accessible via ten hour Megabus trip

Thumbnail image for UK testing ‘Megalabs’ will only be accessible via ten hour Megabus trip

In line with the government’s existing testing strategy, new facilities – known as ‘Megalabs’ – will be incredibly difficult to get to.

Read the full article →

Thames Water issues moon with overdue water bill

Thumbnail image for Thames Water issues moon with overdue water bill

Thames Water has wasted absolutely no time in calculating the moon’s water bill.

Read the full article →

Organisms on moon think Tory MPs are scum, announce NASA

Thumbnail image for Organisms on moon think Tory MPs are scum, announce NASA

NASA has announced that they have received a mysterious signal from the lunar surface stating that all Tory MPs are scum.

Read the full article →

Nobel Prize for Medicine awarded to infectious disease experts in the Facebook comments

Thumbnail image for Nobel Prize for Medicine awarded to infectious disease experts in the Facebook comments

Today, the Nobel Committee awarded the Nobel Prize for Medicine to all the infectious disease experts who have continuously and selflessly advanced medical research by sharing their knowledge through informed comments and posts on Facebook.

Read the full article →

Brain-eating microbe in US water supply explains a f*cking hell of a lot, insist scientists

Thumbnail image for Brain-eating microbe in US water supply explains a f*cking hell of a lot, insist scientists

A brain-munching microbe found feasting on the intelligence of ordinary US citizens has sparked fears that that particular horse has already fucking bolted, according to reports.

Read the full article →

Martian tripods successfully conquer Earth after adopting social distancing precautions

Thumbnail image for Martian tripods successfully conquer Earth after adopting social distancing precautions

An invasion of planet Earth by hostile Martian invasion forces has been entirely successful, due to the Martians taking sanitary precautions this time.

Read the full article →

Virus that can tell the difference between colleagues and friends continues to baffle scientists

Thumbnail image for Virus that can tell the difference between colleagues and friends continues to baffle scientists

A virus that can somehow discriminate between business and social interactions continues to mystify the brightest minds in the scientific community.

Read the full article →

Potential life on Venus already eyeing up ‘soft-touch’ UK benefits system, warns Nigel Farage

Thumbnail image for Potential life on Venus already eyeing up ‘soft-touch’ UK benefits system, warns Nigel Farage

Following the discovery of phosphine gas in the atmosphere of Venus, which could indicate life on the planet, Nigel Farage has warned that alien civilisations could already be planning to take advantage of Britain’s “soft-touch” benefits system. Highlighting data from a graph he discovered on the Internet, Brexit Party leader and independent journalist specialising in […]

Read the full article →

Rubik’s Cube impossible, confirms scientist

Thumbnail image for Rubik’s Cube impossible, confirms scientist

After nearly forty years of experimentation and investigation, a scientist has confirmed that it is impossible to solve the Rubik’s Cube.

Read the full article →