Business

Gillette commercial nowhere near as offensive as the price of their f*cking razor blades

Thumbnail image for Gillette commercial nowhere near as offensive as the price of their f*cking razor blades

If you’re offended by Gillette’s advertising, wait until you hear how much their products cost.

Read the full article →

Man furious at Gillette for ‘bullying is bad’ advert perfectly happy to be targeted by ‘this product helps you get sex’ adverts

Thumbnail image for Man furious at Gillette for ‘bullying is bad’ advert perfectly happy to be targeted by ‘this product helps you get sex’ adverts

Commercial companies should not be using sensitive subjects such as bullying and toxic masculinity to promote their products, and should instead focus on implying their products help us have more sex, according to Simon Williams this morning.

Read the full article →

Amazon boss Jeff Bezos celebrates divorce deal after being awarded 50% of wife’s hair

Thumbnail image for Amazon boss Jeff Bezos celebrates divorce deal after being awarded 50% of wife’s hair

Jeff Bezos is the true winner in the divorce with his wife Mackenzie as he looks set to receive half her beautiful long, flowing locks in the settlement.

Read the full article →

No-deal Brexit rehearsal ‘goes well’ as 87 trucks successfully drive straight over a Dover cliff

Thumbnail image for No-deal Brexit rehearsal ‘goes well’ as 87 trucks successfully drive straight over a Dover cliff

A live rehearsal of an emergency traffic system to be rolled out in the event of no-deal Brexit has gone ‘pretty well’ a Department for Transport spokesperson has confirmed.

Read the full article →

Jobs at risk as revolutionary Italian restaurant puts black pepper on every table

Thumbnail image for Jobs at risk as revolutionary Italian restaurant puts black pepper on every table

There has been an outcry today over one Italian restaurant’s ‘ridiculous’ decision to provide customers with their own pepper mills, enabling them to season their food unassisted.

Read the full article →

Brexit ferry contract transferred to Trotters Independent Traders

Thumbnail image for Brexit ferry contract transferred to Trotters Independent Traders

The Brexit ferry debacle is finally over, with the contract being given over to two highly capable London-based businessmen.

Read the full article →

People should spend more screen-time reading satirical websites, confirm doctors

Thumbnail image for People should spend more screen-time reading satirical websites, confirm doctors

A massive report into the effects of screen-time on the human brain published today has concluded that people should spend a lot more time reading satirical websites.

Read the full article →

People who laugh at ‘snowflakes’ currently losing their shit over vegan sausage rolls

Thumbnail image for People who laugh at ‘snowflakes’ currently losing their shit over vegan sausage rolls

Piers Morgan and people like him are having a complete meltdown over some pastry.

Read the full article →

Sales of CDs slump after no-one has any room left in the garage

Thumbnail image for Sales of CDs slump after no-one has any room left in the garage

Sales of CDs plummeted by 23% last year, as consumers realised there’s no more space in the garage for little plastic boxes that they have to climb over to find.

Read the full article →

New Greggs sausage rolls not only vegan but also HALAL

Thumbnail image for New Greggs sausage rolls not only vegan but also HALAL

The Daily Mail and their readers lost even more of their shit this morning as it was revealed Greggs’ new line of vegan sausage rolls are HALAL.

Read the full article →