World

We were forced to attack people carrying a coffin because they were clearly about to use it as a projectile, insists Israel

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Israel has defended its security service members who attacked pallbearers carrying the coffin of Palestinian American Al Jazeera reporter Shireen Abu Aqleh, insisting they were clearly planning to use to coffin as a weapon.

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Expect Moldova to win Eurovision next year, says Putin

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Vladimir Putin has responded to Ukraine’s Eurovision victory with the ominous suggestion that Moldova are his top tip to win next year’s contest.

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Finland has more than enough tractors to defeat a Russian tank invasion, confirms NATO

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NATO are set to allow Finland to join their alliance, after calculating that they probably wouldn’t need military support in the event of a Russian invasion anyway.

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“What if Ukraine’s song is a bit shit though?” ask nervous Eurovision voters

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Ukraine are going to win the Eurovision Song Contest this year, obviously and rightly so, but what if their song is really really shit? Do we still have to give it a twelve?

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Man celebrating end of Roe vs Wade has ‘my body my choice’ anti-vax profile picture

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An American man who is today celebrating the potential end of a woman’s right to choose, is seemingly unaware his social media profile picture literally says ‘my body my choice’.

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If you don’t want a baby, wait until it’s born and let it play with a perfectly legal firearm, American women told

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Religious conservatives have told American women concerned about the Supreme Court overturning Roe v Wade that if they don’t want a baby, there are perfectly constitutionally appropriate ways to get rid of them.

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Republicans ‘to explore’ banning women

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The Republican Party, who have been instrumental in pushing for a potential ban on abortion, are to look into the possibility of removing women’s basic right to exist.

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Elsie sent to Rwanda

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Elsie, the struggling 77-year-old pensioner whose tragic plight was put to Boris Johnson during an interview with a woman who is not Lorraine, has seen her fortunes change after he personally intervened to have her sent to a nation where it’s warm year round.

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Taliban praises US Supreme Court for plans to clamp down on women’s rights

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After a leaked majority opinion suggested that the US Supreme Court could be on the verge of overturning the landmark Roe vs Wade decision, Taliban officials in Afghanistan have welcomed the move and praised the regressive thinking behind it.

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Woke Disney cartoons harm my child’s development, insists man who is fine with them doing active shooter drills at elementary school

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A man who has boycotted all things Disney because of the ‘psychological damage being done to children with their woke liberal agenda’ is perfectly happy that his child needs to practice active shooter drills at elementary school.

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