“It’s the most watertight thing we’ve ever created” insists Titanic sub firm OceanGate about its liability waiver

author avatar by 12 months ago

The liability waving documents signed by customers who set foot inside a small pressurised tube before travelling almost four kilometres under the Atlantic Ocean, are completely watertight, according to Oceangate this morning.

With concerns still lingering that their liability waiver could prove to be unfit for purpose when under the immense pressure exerted by the families of billionaires, a spokesperson for the firm, Chuck Williams, insisted that no expense was spared when constructing the waiver.

Williams explained, “We invested heavily in the best legal minds in the world to ensure this liability waiver is completely watertight, even when faced with the enormous pressure of lawyers acting on behalf of some of the world’s richest families.

“The sub we sent down to the Titanic might have been run by an off-brand PS5 controller, but we assure you that the terms of our liability waiver are state of the art. No expense was spared.

“It has been designed to withstand the pressure of up to a thousand lawyers per square inch, which is well above the industry standard for this type of document. The risk of a catastrophic implosion of our legal protection is basically nil.

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“I can assure you, there is nothing we take more seriously than the safety of our profit margins. If anything in this business could be at risk of having less-than-perfect structural integrity, it most definitely won’t be our liability waiver.”

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