The pie of the day on the food menu in the pub you are visiting is, once again, steak and ale, it has been confirmed.
The news means the unbroken reign of steak and ale as the chosen pie of the day in every sodding pub has now extended to a 1,564th consecutive day.
“Er, let me check for you….,” said waiter Simon Williams, in response to your genuinely interested follow-up to the invitation on the pub menu to ask about what the pie of the day is.
“Yep, it’s steak and ale today,” confirmed Williams after pretending to consult the chef.
“Not gonna lie, it has been steak and ale for a few days now,” admitted Williams.
“Although we did mix things up for St Patrick’s day and offered a quite unique ‘Steak and Guinness’ pie.
“Oh, and if you’re interested in the battered catch of the day mentioned on the menu, let me put you out of your misery.
“It’s going to be haddock.”