Describing good food as ‘om, nom, nom’ to become a criminal offence

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The use of the phrase ‘om, nom, nom’ on social media to describe a nice meal will finally become a criminal offence, it has been confirmed. 

The new law will mean anyone using the words alongside an Instagram picture of a takeaway Nandos, or a Facebook post of a quick stir fry they’ve just rustled up will face an automatic prison tariff of three years. 

As part of their sentence, they will also have to utter ‘om, nom, nom’ loudly to their fellow inmates after finishing each of their prison meals. 

“The hope is that people will now think twice before putting this tedious child-like nonsense of a phrase next to any shared photograph of food online,” said Simon Williams of the Crown Prosecution Service.

“People think that ‘om-nom-nomming is a victimless crime,” continued Williams sombrely. 

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“Yet there are thousands of people suffering post-traumatic stress after innocently scrolling through their social media feeds and then having to conjure up the loud noises people are actually making as they trough down their McDonalds.

“We’re so pleased that this has made it onto the statute book,” said Williams.

“My entire team are now off to celebrate with a few drinks and a nice beef wellington. Om nom nom.”