Google Maps to start showing ‘scenic’ routes which are just a bit less shit

author avatar by 3 years ago

Google Maps is to start directing drivers to routes which it calculates are just a little bit more ‘scenic’ based on a list of factors it is revealed today.

With news emerging of a new eco-friendly option being released on the search engine’s satellite navigation app, Google bosses have also revealed an exciting new ‘scenic’ option today aimed at providing ‘nicer’ and a bit less depressing routes home from today, just to cheer people up.

Head of development Simon Williams at Google revealed “It’s an exciting development and makes your journey just a bit less, you know, shit.

“We’ve decided to add a new option to our navigation system, along with the really boring but fastest route, and new eco-friendly options.

“We just want to take people a prettier way home, maybe by the sea or through a few nice country roads for an hour or something, so it’s nice.

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“Obviously finding a nice scenic route in some areas of the country, such as Birmingham, is near impossible, so the journey might take a little longer than expected, by four or five hours maybe.

“But it’s worth it just to get away from all the concrete and shite and actually see somewhere nice for the first time in months.:

Asked what effect adding an average of two hours onto a person’s journey might have on the environment, we were told “Fuck the environment. People will be happy.”