Environment

Actually, King Charles should definitely attend COP 27, decides Liz Truss

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The Prime Minister has changed her mind. Again. Yesterday, Liz Truss was advising the King that he should stay away from the COP 27 climate change conference which takes place next month in Egypt.  So naturally, this morning she’s decided that he definitely has to go. “Given the King’s passion for environmental issues, including how […]

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Truss accuses environmentalists of bigoted ‘anti-earthquakism’ as she rushes through Fracking Bill

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Liz Truss has hit back at campaigners against lifting the Fracking Ban, labelling their anti-natural disaster stance as the worst kind of woke virtue signalling.

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Energy crisis forces 73-year-old London man to take on new full-time job

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A 73-year-old man from London has been forced to take on a new full-time job thanks to concerns over the ongoing energy crisis and the cost of heating his admittedly rather large homes.

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Just buy 100 new kettles you idiots

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Boris Johnson has solved the cost-of-living crisis for millions of people in Britain worried about their energy bills this winter. 

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Water bosses told to clean up the nation’s shoreline using thousands of tiny turd bags

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Water bosses are facing an ordeal facing millions of pet owners every day, after being told to clean up their shit using tiny plastic bags.

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Heavy rains herald beginning of the hosepipe ban

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As hosepipe bans come into force across Britain, nature has decided to properly take the piss.

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Climate sceptic think tank recommends huge pile of burning tyres

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A climate sceptic think tank has recommended that, to combat a number of recently introduced green measures, a huge pile of tyres is built and then set on fire.

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Nation that made it illegal to leave one turd in a field seemingly comfortable with millions of turds on its beaches

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As millions of turds find themselves floating around the nations beaches, many have questioned how this can be legal but you can get a fine for leaving a single dog turd in a disused field.

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More bodies discovered in Willy Wonka’s chocolate river following drought

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A further three children’s bodies have been recovered from the chocolate river in Willy Wonka’s factory, after drought conditions led to the levels dropping so far they revealed the riverbed.

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Scientists urged to divert attention away from space exploration to create pillow that stays cool all night

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Scientists have been urged to put their brainpower to something more critical than the long-term survival of the human race and to solve the mystery of the pillow that won’t stay cool during the night.

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