Students who bunked lectures during Homeopathy degree secure better marks than full attendees

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The University of Basingstoke has confirmed that the less often students turned up for classes on its new Homeopathy degree course, the higher the mark they got.

The finding comes following a research study which tracked the attendance of students who attended fewer and fewer lectures and seminars over the course of the year.

Course leader Jennie Robson said, “We first became aware of the phenomenon when we realised that we hadn’t actually seen the top scoring students in the summer term dissertation since Christmas.

“Although we’d hoped that our intensive, continuous teaching methods were the best way to progress on the course, it appears that less face-to-face contact may, in fact, be the secret to effective study on this course.

“The guy who got the best mark of all students who graduated didn’t attend a single lecture, as far as we can tell he merely walked passed a classroom during a briefing on the principles of homeopathic dilution.

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“And his success certainly came as a surprise to the homeopathy lecturers here, I can tell you.”

Tom Gilbert, one of the absentee students who did unexpectedly well, told us, “The lectures were so dull that after a few weeks myself and few mates decided to hang out in the pub instead of going into Uni.

“We then found out that you can actually pay someone to write your dissertation, so we just buggered off to Bali, logged into our emails once a week and used our student loans to buy exotic drinks.”