Education

School PTA raises £50,000 by promising no events in 2020

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A West Yorkshire primary school has succeeded in raising an astonishing £50,000 by charging £100 per family, in exchange for cancelling all PTA events throughout 2020.

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Parents weep with joy as children go back to school

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Mums and Dads across the UK have realised that the unconditional love they feel for their children is actually very dependent on not spending more than two weeks in their company.

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Tories to introduce tax on shit Christmas gifts teachers receive from kids

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Teachers are ecstatic to discover that the Conservatives will now be taxing them on all the crappy gifts that kids get them at the end of term.

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Question Time audience left shocked as Boris Johnson’s trousers burst into flames

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The election edition of Question Time has ended in chaos after firemen were called to the stage following the seemingly spontaneous combustion of Boris Johnson’s trousers.

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Fight erupts at Conservative conference after attendee reveals he went to state school

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A scuffle has broken out at the Conservative party conference this afternoon.

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Boy missing school to take part in global climate strike wins fourth straight game of Fifa

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A fourteen-year-old schoolboy from Basingstoke is today fighting for the environment whilst also improving his Fifa skills on his PlayStation.

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Man fakes own death to avoid getting involved with school PTA

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A parent has taken the elaborate step of pretending to die in order to wriggle out of any Parent-Teacher Association activities.

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Duchess of Cambridge FUMING as Prince George sent home from school for inappropriate haircut

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The Duchess of Cambridge is said to be extremely upset after her son was sent home from school for a contravention of the dress code.

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Eton applications at all-time low after public see the sort of adults it produces

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It has been revealed that applications for Eton college are at an all-time low after parents have been able to see real-life examples of the adults the school produces.

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Teachers celebrate as new £30k salary almost brings them up to the hourly minimum wage

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Teachers are ecstatic that the government’s cynical and empty pre-election pledge of raising their salaries to £30k will finally almost bring them up to the national minimum wage for each hour of their work.

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