Trump relishing the opportunity to fall asleep in meetings in China

Donald Trump is apparently relishing the opportunity of falling asleep during his meeting with Xi Jinping, White House sources have revealed. 

The US president began his two-day visit to China on Wednesday, where talks between the two leaders will start just as soon as Trump finally wakes up.

“Shhhh, just give him a few more minutes,” said White House advisor Chuck Williams, throwing a blanket over the US president. 

“I know everyone is keen to talk about tariffs, the tech industry and Taiwan, but he always gets cranky if he doesn’t get a good eight hours of sleep during the middle of the day. He was playing golf all day yesterday, which probably tuckered the little guy out. Bless him.

“Just ignore the whale sounds. They help him nod off. I’ve told President Xi he’s just going to have to wait.

“They can moan all they like, but the fact is that every world leader falls asleep during important meetings. You’re telling me Macron doesn’t catch forty winks at 1pm? Of course he does. It’s part of the job.

“Damn. I think I left his orthopaedic pillow in the car. Oh well, if I bend myself into the right shape I can probably emulate it. Now, if you’ll please excuse me, the president needs my body to sleep on.”

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