Viktor Orbán was winning by a landslide until photo with JD Vance, finds report

The outgoing Hungarian Prime Minister Viktor Orbán was on course for a landslide victory until being photographed alongside JD Vance, a new report has found.

Viktor Orbán suffered a humiliating defeat to Péter Magyar in the Hungarian election last night, though it seems Orbán would have won his fifth straight election if only he hadn’t been seen with US Vice President JD Vance.

“He’s cursed,” said Orbán, asking whose idea it was to invite JD Vance to Hungary.

“Everything he touches turns to shit. He’s like a faecal King Midas. He killed Pope Francis and now he’s made me lose the election. Honestly, if he’d taken the picture with Magyar he probably would’ve lost too. 

“Look, I know what you’re going to say. ‘You lost because you’re unpopular, not because of JD Vance.’ But come on, it can’t have helped. Not even Republicans like JD Vance. Not even Trump likes JD Vance. Not even his own wife and kids like JD Vance.

“I mean, who wants an endorsement from someone who does ungodly things to sofas? It’s career suicide. 

“I should probably warn Nigel Farage not to meet with Vance before the May elections in the UK. Reform are leading in the polls, but one photo of Farage and Vance together and it’s all over for them. 

“No wonder Trump keeps sending him anywhere but the US.”

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