Banksy paints giant c*ck on Reuters building

Banksy has painted a giant c*ck on the side of the Reuters headquarters in London after an investigation by the news outlet revealed the graffiti artist’s real name.

The true identity of the world-famous artist was apparently found in court documents from 2000, with Reuters now slightly regretting revealing Banksy’s name after seeing the massive penis on the side of their building.

“It’s going to be an absolute nightmare to wash off,” said building caretaker Simon Williams.

“Luckily, it’s not the first cock I’ve had to scrub off the building. It’s definitely the most detailed, though. I get why people like his art so much. He really puts a lot into his craft. Some people would just come here and draw any old cock on the building, but not Banksy. That stencil must have been HUGE. The guy is a true professional.

“So far, we’ve had dozens of people trying to take the glass out to sell it. Apparently the cock could go for millions at auction. I’m not entirely sure what type of person would want to bid on a painting of a giant penis on dozens of panes of glass, but each to their own. I suppose it might look okay in someone’s back garden?

“Rumour has it Michelangelo painted a giant cock on the Medici house when they refused to commission his new sculpture, so this kind of thing does happen from time to time. I think it’s in MoMA if anybody wants to see it.”