Rochdale rejects ‘mainstream politics’ by electing career politician with a murky past

Cat impressionist George Galloway has landed on his feet again, after some how convincing the Rochdale by-election voters that he is ‘different’.

“This represents a rejection of the established politics”, claimed the established politician. “Though I must admit I thought it would be harder to get back into parliament during in a recession.”

“The people of Rochdale have spoken”, declared Galloway, while rubbing one ear with his wrist.

“8 out of 10 homeowners said their MP’s a cat pervert.”

Galloway took the decision to stand in Rochdale after realising there was enough room to swing a coup, if he pretended that he cared about the city, and could find it on a map.

Hailing his victory as ‘the single greatest moment in the universe, in the past, the present and the future’, Galloway humbly accepted the ceremonial expenses form and keys to a second home.

“This one’s for Gaza!”, he cried, while ordering a new carpet. “Can someone ask my agent to phone Endemol?”

Galloway accused the three main parties of ‘living in a fantasy world’, then stuck out one leg and started licking his bottom.

While Labour didn’t stand a candidate, and the Conservative party knew they didn’t have a cat’s chance in hell, they will still take umbrage at losing to such a flea-bitten old mouser.

“We will learn from this humbling experience”, claimed Rishi Sunak, as he set down a bowl of anti-freeze by Rochdale town hall.

“By rejecting us in this way, we know exactly where we stand with these people”, he went on.

“That’s why I’m unveiling the new combined Rochdale incinerator, nuclear power plant and meat rendering factory.

“There’s more than one way to skin a cat.”

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