Wife discovers puddle where husband used to be

A wife has discovered a puddle where her husband used to be, as the UK continues to swelter in the heatwave. 

Sharon Williams said she slipped on a strange liquid as she walked into the living room, only realising it was her husband when she noticed a pair of glasses in the middle of the puddle.

“The kids were a little bit taken aback,” said Sharon Williams, transferring her husband into an empty Fanta bottle. 

“He said he was melting, but I didn’t realise he was being literal. I only popped out of the room for a second, then when I got back in there was this horrible smell. Honestly, I think he’d do anything to get out of doing the vacuuming. 

“We’ll probably have to put him in the freezer for a few hours to re-solidify him. I think the kids will be a bit too embarrassed to be seen in public with their dad in his current state. I personally don’t mind the liquefied version of him. He’s a lot quieter now and I can turn the football off whenever I want. 

“I did contemplate just pouring him down the drain, but I suppose I better keep him around. Besides, the grass needs cutting and the lawnmower hurts my back.”

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