“They’ve put black people in the adverts again Maureen!” cries racist

A man from Stoke-on-Trent has been left “deeply unsettled” after discovering that people who aren’t white continue to appear in television adverts.

Derek Matthews, 67, made the shocking revelation during a quiet evening in front of the telly, when a perfectly ordinary advert for dishwasher tablets triggered what experts are calling “a full-scale Daily Mail incident.”

“They’ve put black people in the adverts again, Maureen!” shouted Derek, leaping to his feet as though the ethnic diversity of the nation were a personal attack.

“You can’t move for them these days, they’re in everything! Banking adverts, car adverts, even bloody Tesco adverts! It’s political correctness gone mad!”

Maureen, who was just trying to watch The Chase in peace, reportedly told him to “shut up and eat his Battenberg.”

Derek, who often insists he’s “not racist, but”, says he simply misses the good old days when every advert featured “nice white families who didn’t make you think about modern Britain, or indeed reality.”

His comments come after Reform UK MP Sarah Pochin’s heroic decision to say the quiet part out loud on TalkTV, bravely announcing that adverts are now “full of black people, full of Asian people,” as if ITV had been overtaken by the United Nations.

“Representation’s gone too far,” Derek said, gesturing at his screen as a smiling black couple bought washing powder. “I just want adverts that look like me!”

Sources close to Maureen reveal that Derek has never bought washing powder in his life, and the only time he shows even a remote interest in the product is when an advert for it includes ethnic minorities.

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