Esther McVey promoted from Common Sense Minister to Minister for Silly Walks

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Tory MP Esther McVey has been appointed Minister for Silly Walks following her stellar performance as Minister for Common Sense.

After six months as minister for common sense, Rishi Sunak has been delighted at her achievements, largely in banning rainbow lanyards in government buildings, and has therefore been promoted to the far more important role of minister for silly walks, as the government continues its slow descent into lunacy.

A spokesperson for the government confirmed, “It’s a great promotion and a really important role.

“We can confirm that Esther McVey has been appointed as minister for silly walks with immediate effect.

“We definitely need a minister for silly walks, just like we needed to spend thousands of pounds of taxpayers money on a minister for common sense. It’s just common sense really.

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“Obviously she has some amazing silly walks up her sleeve, which we will no doubt see in the coming weeks, each of which will be absolutely hilarious.

“She is practising them as we speak, and we think it will get us over the line in the General Election once she gets out on the street.”

Asked if the appointment is absolutely necessary, given the other significant issues affecting the country, we were told, “I’m not sure actually.  We probably need to appoint a new minister for common sense to ask them.”