Morality vacuum and Tory MP Brendan Clarke-Smith has offered to volunteer with the Samaritans so that he can play the world’s smallest violin directly to people suffering a mental health crisis.
Just hours after mocking a woman for seeking the help of Samaritans at Glastonbury, Clarke-Smith has insisted he would like to spend more time mocking those suffering with their mental health, and so applied to his local Samaritans.
Samaritans spokesperson Simon Williams told us, “We’ve tried to give him some training, but he insists on laughing down the phone at the people calling in, telling them to pull their socks up, and to stop being so pathetic.
“One woman called in to say she was at her wit’s end because the cost of living crisis, food inflation and lack of support from the government means she struggles to feed her two kids from week to week. Brendan simply rubbed his finger and thumb together and asked her if she could hear that, because it’s the world’s smallest violin.
“Then he told her to get a better job, or to eat cold beans for every meal, and then asked for the next caller like he was on a talk radio show.
“I don’t want to suggest the man is entirely bereft of empathy, but if he was written as a character in Criminal Minds, you’d criticise the writing team for creating a completely unrealistic antagonist.”