In a world-first, NewsThump has lifted the lid on the immoral social media fad where heartless teenagers compete with each other at goading right-wing simpletons into outrage over clearly fake stories about schools providing litter boxes for furries.
Simone Williams, a schoolgirl who wants to be a social media influencer for no better reason than she sees people making millions from it, said she had no remorse for getting Ministers blasting rage spittle over bullshit tales of her peers demanding to be referred to as felines.
She explained, “Why should I feel sorry? All they had to do was make one phone call to the school and they would have known it was rubbish. It’s not my fault they are so blinded by their fear of youth that they will believe any bollocks about teenagers. And since they banned laughing gas we don’t really have any other way to have fun.
“So yeah, I’m now trying to get Tory MPs to make speeches on GB News about how teachers are being forced to pretend kids are flying because we identify as dementors.
“We are going to stage a conversation that sounds like a fight, so a teacher will have to intervene, film it, edit it and then play it to selected mums at our schools. You know, the kind who thinks Just Stop Oil slowing down their school run is the biggest problem in our society. Then we let them complain endlessly to a perplexed school and hope it gets picked up by some morons at the Express.
“It’s not the best plan for future wealth, but it’s not like my generation will be able to invest in property.
“Maybe you can help. Do you happen to have Lee Anderson’s email?”