Second child proves absolutely useless after failing to attend ‘baby sensory’ or yoga classes

author avatar by 1 year ago

A couple’s second child has proven absolutely useless compared to their firstborn, after never once attending any baby sensory classes or any baby yoga as a toddler.

Simon Williams, whose second child has also never been to baby Sing and Sign or even Baby Bloom, revealed how shit his second child was earlier today after admitting he couldn’t be arsed to take them to all that shite again because the novelty had definitely worn off after spending hours sat through them with their first child.

Speaking earlier, he revealed, “Yeah we did everything with the first one, seriously, absolutely f**king everything.

“Baby sensory, baby yoga, baby swimming, baby sing and sign..  Anything. If it had the word baby if front of it, and you had to pay money for it, we did it.

“I mean, it’s all absolutely essential for your baby’s development, obviously. And it really shapes their future both physically and mentally by attending baby sensory at 12 weeks old.

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“It also assists in their cognitive understanding of the world, and helps them to grow emotionally and build better relationships throughout their life, by sitting in a circle playing with coloured tissues at 3 and a half months old.

“Unfortunately, it’s boring as f**k and costs quite a lot of money, so I didn’t bother with the second one, because frankly, who cares about their second child, really?”

Asked if there is any difference whatsoever in the children now that they have grown up a little, he told us, “Yeah, the second one is pretty useless. Can’t do a thing. Undoubtedly because he missed those weeks at baby sensory when he was 12 weeks old.”