Tuesday 3 May 2022 by Mark Molloy

Roy Keane reveals all time Man Utd XI of lazy useless bastards that he totally hates


Roy Keane Manchester United 11

Roy Keane has revealed his all time Manchester United XI lazy useless bastards that he absolutely hates.

The former captain of Manchester United, who hates most people in football for not doing their job properly revealed his starting XI earlier after careful consideration of a number of past and present players. 

Speaking earlier he confirmed, “I’ve nailed it down to a team of eleven utterly useless fuckers.

“Roy Carroll in net, but it was a close call as we’ve had some shite in there since Schmeichel.

“Varela and Rojo centre backs, absolutely shite with Buttner and Darmian as the two full backs. Just do your fecking job man.

“The midfield is Paul Pogba, Kelberson and Bebe and I’m going to put Pogba in there again because he’s such a lazy twat. I hate him.

“But if I need to pick another then it’s Eric Djemba Djemba.

“Then up front we’ve got to be looking at the likes of Sanchez, or Di Maria but I’ve plumped for David Bellion and that lazy fucker Martial because I’d like to rip their heads off.

“It was a difficult team to come up with really as I hate most players and could have really picked hundreds.”

Asked if any of the current Manchester United squad might make it into his actual all time XI best players we were told, “Are you taking the piss?”

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