Wednesday 7 April 2021 by Mark Molloy

Shit drivers should think twice before buying SUVs say RAC


SUV drivers

Shit drivers and people who have no idea what they are doing behind the wheel of a car should think twice before buying big SUV vehicles, says the head of the RAC.

With news emerging today that almost three-quarters of SUVs sold in the UK are registered to people living in towns and cities and who haven’t got a clue how to actually drive, head of the RAC Foundation Steve Gooding has urged potential buyers of the vehicles to think twice before buying one, and perhaps learn how to drive first.

Speaking earlier he told us, “Shit drivers just shouldn’t be allowed to own big vehicles, it’s simple.

“Everyone knows that the majority of SUVs are owned by rich people who predominantly use them for the two and a half-mile round trip to drop the kids at school each day.

“And most of these people have absolutely no idea how to actually drive properly, causing countless scrapes and near misses whilst pissing about on tiny roads in a vehicle designed to plough through a river on a remote farm in the Lake District.

“That’s why we are urging shit drivers to consider which vehicle they purchase when they are looking for a new car, and not to buy something so big and difficult to navigate that they almost wipe out a schoolchild on a daily fucking basis.

“And before you say, ‘well, I’m a good driver’, just picture the ‘average’ driver and then remember that half of the drivers on the road are worse than that, and that group probably includes you.”

Asked what vehicle he would recommend to a shit driver we were told, “I suppose those Smart cars are quite safe, but you look like a twat, so I’d go for an Astra or something.”

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