Friday 22 January 2021 by Mark Molloy

Liverpool praised for commitment to social distancing by not celebrating a single goal since lockdown


Liverpool not scoring a goal

Liverpool Football Club has been commended today by the Premier League and the FA for continuing to adhere to social distancing rules and not celebrating any league goals whatsoever since lockdown.

With further guidelines issued to clubs recently regarding the behaviour of players on TV, particularly when celebrating goals, the Liverpool team have received special praise from all parties for managing to not even celebrate one little bit throughout the whole of January.

A spokesman for the Premier League told us earlier, “Liverpool have done an amazing job here, and we are really proud of them for the example they are setting.

“They have taken the social distancing advice on board from both the government and the Premier League and have done everything they can not to celebrate any goals whatsoever in the league this year.

“The effort required for this level of performance, in managing to not even celebrate one single goal – even when playing Burnley at home – needs special recognition for all involved.

“And I think I speak on behalf of everyone in football when I say that we sincerely hope that they can keep it up for many more weeks to come.”

Asked to comment on the achievement, Liverpool fan Simon Williams told us, “We scored in the FA Cup against those children you dickhead, so stop taking the piss!” before looking at the next two fixtures and crying.

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