“Me, me, me, me, me”: Boris Johnson clarifies position on Brexit

author avatar by 5 years ago

Boris Johnson today clarified his stance on Brexit by insisting: “Me, me, me, me, me.”

The floppy-haired Conservative jester has told friends his principles on Europe will remain intrinsically linked to his chances of becoming Prime Minister.

And he said he remains confident rank-and-file Tories will continue to lap up his ‘loveable cad’ schtick, providing he impresses them with liberal use of Latin and references to Greek mythology.

“Boris’s beliefs have been consistent throughout his career,” said one aide close to the former foreign secretary.

“He believes, above all else, in his own destiny to become Prime Minister.”

NewsThump Best sellers

Friends of Mr Johnson are now preparing for an inevitable leadership campaign and are understood to be considering the slogan ‘Vote for me, plebs, you know you want to’.

One member of the early-planning team said: “Boris wants a slogan that captures the essential truth that Tories in the shires will vote for him however scheming and self-serving he is shown to be.

“Other possibilities being considered include ‘Come On Ladies, Vote for Big Boris’ and ‘Vote Boris for Brilliant Jokes’.

“He hasn’t really thought beyond a snappy slogan so far and, to be honest, he probably won’t bother.

“Let’s be honest, he’s spent the last three years not bothering with any of the facts or details of Brexit, and lots of people still think he has all the answers.”

When asked by reporters outside his home for his reaction to Theresa May’s promise to resign, Johnson said: “Me, me, me, me, me.”