Wednesday 27 March 2019 by Arabin Patson

Cycling world stunned as male rider confesses he would prefer a comfortable saddle


bike saddle

Cycling messages boards and dedicated Facebook groups exploded into acrimonious debate after a man in Ipswich made a post claiming he was not a fan of sitting on a thin bar of rock hard plastic with a bizarre hole that has no godly reason to exist.

The man who started the controversy, Simon Williams, posted on CycleChat that he didn’t understand why he should accept permanent bruising of the perineum on his 5-mile commute along a flat bike path in Leicester.

“It just seems weird to me that the more you pay, the less you enjoy riding. My wife’s town bike cost £200 and has a lovely saddle. Large enough for both cheeks, padded leather and even some springs underneath. You could sit on that all day and not develop a hint of a funny walk.

“I paid over a grand for mine and the saddle looks like something I would need amyl nitrates and a safeword before I sat on it.

“I just think that bike makers should understand that, although a lot of men love carbon fibre frames and ceramic bearings, we don’t all like finishing our ride feeling like we have just kicked in the arse by an angry giraffe.”

Mr Williams maintained he still believed in the core tenets of British bicycle riding.

“I’m not some crazy European who thinks cycling to work is a humdrum affair you can do in regular clobber. I will always don ridiculously colourful lycra clothes, a camelbak water pack and a titanium helmet as I potter along at 10 mph.

“I’m not an anarchist.”

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