James Bond to face consequences of years of sleeping around in upcoming film ‘ItchyCock’

author avatar by 5 years ago

The working title of the twenty-fifth film in the Bond franchise has been revealed, and it says a lot about the titular character’s ongoing sex life.

‘ItchyCock’ will be released next year, and will be the last film to feature Daniel Craig as the famous spy and lothario.

Senior producer Cubby Williams told reporters, “Yes, we are a bit disappointed that the title of Bond 25 has been leaked, but it shouldn’t really be much of a surprise to anyone.

“The famously condom-free James Bond has been having unprotected intercourse with multiple women all over the world for decades now, so it is no wonder that venereal disease was going to strike him down at some point.”

He continued, “The film will contain all the action and suspense sequences of the other movies, interspersed with James popping along to see his GP to pick up some steroid cream for his pus-riddled groin area.”

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Bond fan Christopher James responded, “Well it is a bit of an unusual title, but it’s a lot better than Quantum of Solace.

“I’ve still no clue what that even means.”

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