Jeremy Corbyn finally reveals his own laughably unrealistic Brexit plan

author avatar by 6 years ago

Jeremy Corbyn has silenced accusations that he was avoiding taking a clear stand on Brexit, by finally telling the country about his own utterly delusional strategy to leave the EU.

The Labour party received with great fanfare this new Brexit vision that could only work if every leader the EU was a complete idiot or a rabid anglophile that hated their own nation.

Simon Williams, a Momentum activist, explained that by embracing the fantasist notion of an unrealistically successful Brexit, Jeremy Corbyn was proving he was ready for government.

He went on, “It is time for the Tories to admit failure and let someone else make ridiculously bombastic claims about how much the EU will readily agree to give us.

“Today Jeremy has proved that he can make utterly bullshit claims about the 27 EU countries somehow accepting to harm their own economies just to make us happy.

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“The British public voted to be bitterly deceived while being told paradise awaits around the corner and we will deliver that. In a nice socialist fashion.”

Mr Williams also maintained that the Labour Party would not suffer the kind of bitter infighting that dogged Theresa May’s attempts to strike a good deal with Europe.

He went on, “The big egos and social Darwinism embraced by the Tories has been shown to be a detriment to the country.

“We are much more united. Maybe if the Conservatives sent groups of fanatical militants to deselect MPs they think are disloyal, or harass them to the extent they need bodyguards, we wouldn’t be in this mess.”