Hillary Clinton offers advice to ‘Crooked Ivanka’ on deleting emails

author avatar by 5 years ago

Presidential runner-up Hillary Clinton has reached out to the Trump family in their time of need and offered to guide them through the process of getting rid of potentially incriminating emails.

Clinton, who was labelled as ‘crooked’ by a curiously orange man who would happily cut off a testicle to just be in the same room as Vladimir Putin, has offered to help that man and his family avoid future email-based embarrassment.

“Hey Ivanka – need a hand deleting some emails?” she tweeted, with more than a hint of sarcasm.

“Who is crooked now then, eh? Say it, Trumpy, say it. Then I might help you out… Also, who had more votes again?” she added, to the amusement of everyone.

Speaking to reporters outside her home, Hillary Clinton explained, “Admittedly, I do have a bit of experience deleting loads of emails in order to avoid possible recriminations, and I’m happy to show the members of the Trump family how to do just that.

“And in return, all I shall be asking is for President Trump to admit he is, after all, the crooked one, and for him to actually start acting in a presidential fashion for the benefit of the people who live in the USA.

“But I reckon both of those could be too much to ask, so let’s just wait for the impeachment.”

Neither Donald Trump nor his daughter Ivanka has responded to the offer, having mysteriously become suddenly very quiet over the last 24 hours on the topic of personal email servers.