by 
Nineteenth-century gentleman Jacob Rees-Mogg has clarified the circumstances in which it is fine to judge other people.
The MP for Victorian values appeared on Jeremy Vine’s Channel 5 TV show to discuss Boris Johnson’s latest affair and to explain why judging him for it would be wholly inappropriate.
“We are instructed in the Bible not to judge other people, but to leave that side of things to God,” droned Rees-Mogg to a studio audience full of atheists and agnostics.
“And as such, we cannot judge Boris for having multiple affairs. In fact, he is merely obeying the Old Testament instruction to ‘go forth and multiply’, so he should be applauded, if anything.”
He was then asked if Boris himself was displaying true Christian values, which Rees-Mogg insisted was ‘irrelevant’.
He explained, “Jesus said ‘let he who is without sin cast the first stone’, meaning that none of us is fit to judge anyone else. Although I’m sure Jesus would have added ‘apart from where you might be chucking a rock at an abortion clinic, in which case anyone can have a go’. Definitely.
“I think women who are getting abortions are the most evil people in the world, and I’m sure I know how God feels about it too. Because I am a man of faith, which is always the best position to take – unless it’s the wrong faith, obviously.
Boris responded, “Thank you Jacob for backing me up there. Hopefully the knowledge that I pressured one of my mistresses into getting an abortion won’t change how you think of me.”
