America’s overnight immigration statistics have rocketed by another two after Donald Trump decided to invite the in-laws.
Melania Trump’s parents, Viktor and Amalijah Knavs, both Eastern Europeans with excellent plumbing skills, took the oath of citizenship in New York where they had been living in a camper van with twenty other Slovenians.
Meanwhile, the US First Lady is delighted at the effortless way in which her parents became naturalized, especially as her husband had earlier described so-called ‘chain’ immigration in which one family member is able to get the rest of the family into the country as ‘truly evil’.
However millions of other potential rapists will have to wait in line – one behind the other – which won’t exactly help things.
Although the Knavs will face a wait to be housed, fed and clothed at the taxpayers’ expense, it’s understood there are plenty of spare rooms going in the Whitehouse.
However, critics are concerned America’s borders are coming under increasing pressure from Melania Trump’s extended family.
Immigration expert, Chuck Williams, said, “She has another six nephews waiting patiently in Ljubljana. When asked where they would like to live, they said ‘America First’. Apparently, their Aunt said she could arrange it for them. She knows ‘the right people’.
President Trump said, “My in-laws are great people, just great. They’re not the rapey kind of immigrants at all.
“Also, I’m so pleased that Melania’s folks could come and be with her. Maybe we can finally put to rest claims that I’m a fan of migrant children being separated from their parents.”