Judge Jules powerless to stop Brexit

author avatar by 7 years ago

World-renowned DJ “Judge” Jules cannot stand in the way of Brexit on account of not being a real judge, it has emerged.

Jules, whose real name is Julius O’ Riordan according to Wikipedia, was absent from the recent Brexit High Court proceedings due to a special guest appearance at an all-nighter in Ibiza.

The 50-year-old – God is it really that long ago – is thought to have no strong opinion either way on Britain leaving the EU, but insists if people disagree with it, they should ‘make some noise’.

Jules believes the recent referendum should have been decided by a big show of hands, preferably in the air.

“I do hold a law degree from the LSE, hence my DJ name, but my specialist area is the Entertainments Industry so it’s mainly stuff like sorting out record contracts and that,” he told us.

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“Sorry, I can’t be of more help.”

The influential artist believes that if Brexit does happen, it should be as seamless as the 1992 Creamfields set featuring Frankie “Shag” Bones and Tall Paul.

He added, “Big shout goin’ out to the whistle posse!”