Returning to the office after a week off is like having complex dental surgery with no anaesthetic, a survey suggests.
New research rates the first day back at work as at least eight times worse than serious back pain and very nearly on a par with a short trip to IKEA.
“People are launched into a unique kind of emotional chasm as they bleakly contemplate less dreadful ways to make a living,” said lead researcher, Professor Simon Williams.
“They’ll often spend the morning drafting a resignation letter to hurl at their boss triumphantly before beginning a new life abroad.
“Then they’re hit with the stark realisation that it’s not really feasible to retrain as a lifeguard or emigrate to a hot country and somehow make ends meet by selling ham.”
Project Manager, Nick Ferguson, said, “This time last week I was sat on a beach with people I actually like.
“Today will be spent reading emails from people I can only tolerate by imagining I’ve taken a shitload of diazepam.
“I might have a cry later.”