Woman going to Ibiza can’t even say it properly

Local woman Simone Williams has booked her holiday to Ibiza despite being unable to even say it properly, according to friends today.

Simone insists on saying ‘Ibeezer’ no matter how often she’s told, and friends are wondering if she’s just doing it to piss them off.

“It doesn’t matter how often she’s been told. Even the travel agent corrected her in the shop,” said friend Meg Copley, who is now regretting agreeing to go with her.

“I can’t tell if she’s genuinely that thick, or if she’s just yanking my chain.

“And she keeps going on about ‘avin’ it large and ‘mad stylee’, which is just a bit sad really because she’s from Swindon and it just sounds forced.

“I suppose it could be worse. We could be going to Yorkshire. You should hear how she says Penistone and Clitheroe.”

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