After letting the Internet choose name of his new political party, Jeremy Corbyn set to become leader of ‘Party McPartyface’
by Viv Aldi 1 year ago 
Former Labour leader Jeremy Corbyn has sparked a frenzy of online creativity after asking supporters to help name his new political party.
Within minutes, suggestions ranged from the lovingly earnest to the clinically unhinged, as the Internet jumped at the opportunity like a Momentum activist at an all-you-can-eat hummus buffet.
Corbyn, who announced plans to form a new ‘grassroots, member-led movement for real change’, took to social media to crowdsource ideas.
“We want a name that reflects hope, solidarity, and that I definitely won’t regret asking Twitter for,” he posted, moments before the comments section became an anarchic poetry slam.
Among the early front-runners were: ‘Party McPartyface’ (obviously); ‘The Oh Jeremy Corbyn Appreciation Society’; ‘Beardy McBeardface’; ‘The Left is Right Party’ and ‘Grandad’s Army’.
One supporter suggested ‘Labour, But We Mean It This Time’, while another proposed ‘Beard & Loathing’ with a manifesto commitment to nationalise Glastonbury. Even rival politicians are getting involved. A spokesperson for the Green Party tweeted, “We respectfully offer ‘Jeremy’s Sustainable Garden Alliance’”, while Nigel Farage weighed in with “The Loony Left Beard and Sandals Brigade”.
Political analysts warn the public naming strategy could backfire. “There’s a 90% chance the official name will end up being a meme,” said Professor Simone Williams of the Institute for Branding Disasters, “though, to be fair, it’s still less embarrassing than Change UK.”
Meanwhile, insiders claim Corbyn’s team is secretly hoping for something more earnest, like ‘The Justice Party’ or ‘Democratic Social Alliance’. However, one source admitted, “Frankly, if it gets people to vote for us, we’d settle for ‘The Free Sausage Rolls Party.’”
When approached for comment, Corbyn remained calm, simply stating, “It’s called participatory democracy.” He then sighed heavily as he was handed a petition with 100,000 signatures demanding the party be named ‘The National Beard Service’.
Voting closes next week. Experts believe the final name will be ‘a catastrophic fusion of well-meaning sincerity and total chaos’.
So, business as usual.
Yet more NewsThump stories
Trump tackles voter concern over excessive cruelty in immigration policy by promoting man responsible for it
AI finally finds ‘true purpose’ in British society by helping people complain more efficiently
Businesses warn publishing salaries will attract applicants who are only interested in being paid
Those who insisted “innocent until proven guilty!” assert Russell Brand’s innocence despite proven guilt
Donald Trump appoints Lord Voldemort as Chief of Staff
