Watchdog demands Tom Cruise change misleading movie title to ‘Mission: Extremely Difficult, But Ultimately Doable with Sufficient Resources’
by Nathan Cowley 1 year ago An entertainment watchdog has demanded Tom Cruise change the misleading title of the ‘Mission: Impossible’ movie franchise to ‘Mission: Extremely Difficult, But Ultimately Doable with Sufficient Resources’.
The title change was requested following the release of ‘Mission: Impossible – The Final Reckoning’, with cinemas now wondering how to fit all those words onto the new poster.
“It doesn’t exactly roll off the tongue,” said a disappointed Cruise.
“Obviously the missions aren’t literally impossible, because I’ve made eight of these films now. I just assumed everyone understood they weren’t supposed to take the title literally.
“You know what these watchdogs are like. They suck all the fun out of everything. I remember they wanted us to change the title of ‘Vanilla Sky’ because there was no way of verifying what flavour the sky tasted of.
“And don’t even get me started on ‘Born on the Fourth of July’. They kept saying to me, ‘But Mr Cruise, you were born on the third of July.’ I remember Jack Nicholson phoning me up once and asking why the working title was, ‘A Couple of the Men Were Alright, Though Most of Them Were Bad’.
“Honestly, these watchdogs are completely nuts. And that’s coming from a Scientologist.”
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