Man checking ID at polling station treating the job like he’s looking for spies at Checkpoint Charlie

An officious twat is revelling in checking the ID of all the young people coming to vote in the general election, according to reports this morning.

Derek Matthews, 67, has taken to stopping all young people outside the polling station in Little Arseworth with an outstretched arm and a demand to ‘see their papers’.

However, many young voters expressed their surprise that someone would take so much enjoyment from an attempt to prevent them from exercising their democratic rights.

Jake Williams, 21, told us, “I was too young to vote in the general election of 2019, so this general election has been my introduction to the nationwide democratic process in this country.

“So far, I have to say I feel like I’m suspected of trying to sneak across the border in Cold War Germany, rather than deciding which of the candidates will do the best job of preventing my future prospects from going down the toilet.

“I had expected some sort of warm glow from taking part in the age-old democratic process and having my voice heard as an equal to my peers – but actually, I feel like a fugitive who is attempting to sneak past a fascist regime in search of freedom.

“I have a different haircut on my driving licence, and the old fella checking it must have looked at it, and back at me, and back at it, about a dozen times before he let me through to vote. I was starting to sweat, worried that actually, it was me who had made a mistake, and that I wasn’t actually allowed to vote.

“I’d give it a 4 out of 10. Not sure I’d want to do it again.”

However, Derek explained that the new process is much better now that everyone is being treated equally.

“I’m just following orders,” he told us.

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