Entire nation left wondering which weirdos are choosing to eat only ‘part’ of an Easter egg

After the NHS advised against eating whole Easter eggs in one sitting, the entire nation wondered what sort of weirdo would follow that advice.

With concerns over rising obesity, the NHS issued the guidance under the laughably misguided belief that people don’t snarf down all of the Easter eggs sometime on Sunday morning.

Consumer Simon Williams told us, “If people were supposed to only eat part of an Easter egg, then they would sell part of an egg.

“This is like those chocolate companies that sell bags of their confection and put on the label ‘sharing bag’. As if.”

Meanwhile, the nation’s children have barely ceased laughing after being asked politely by their parents to maybe ration their chocolate intake this coming weekend.

Seven-year-old Jake Williams told us, “I intend to inhale all of my eggs in a frenzy of chocolate carnage before spending the following couple of hours running around like an amphetamine junkie.

“Just like Jesus intended.”

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