New footage casts doubt on theory the Minions did not work for Hitler

For years, fans of the Minions films have accepted creator Pierre Coffin’s explanation that the little yellow henchmen were safely trapped in an ice cave throughout the Nazi era, conveniently preventing them from serving the most evil man alive.

However, newly discovered footage appears to show one suspiciously goggle-wearing yellow creature wandering around occupied Europe carrying paperwork in a manner described by historians as “alarmingly Gestapo-ish”.

“Look, we’re not saying it’s definitely a Minion,” said military historian Simon Williams. “We’re just saying it’s a three-foot-tall yellow idiot enthusiastically following orders without the faintest idea what it’s doing. That narrows the field considerably.”

The discovery has prompted renewed scrutiny of several catastrophic Nazi blunders that, until now, had been blamed on conventional military incompetence.

“It would certainly explain why someone accidentally left an Enigma machine on a train after becoming distracted by a banana,” Williams continued.

“Likewise, we now have a compelling theory for why Operation Barbarossa appears to have begun with three weeks spent marching in entirely the wrong direction while one soldier repeatedly shouted ‘Bello!'”

Other researchers believe the creatures may have played a decisive role in the Battle of Britain after enthusiastically refuelling the Luftwaffe with orange squash, before accidentally posting invasion plans to the wrong address because they thought the envelope looked funny.

Military analysts now estimate that, had Hitler employed almost anyone even marginally more competent than the Minions, the war could have lasted several minutes longer.

Illumination has continued to insist that no Minions ever worked for Hitler, pointing to the official timeline established in the films.

Critics remain unconvinced.

“As every Minions film has demonstrated,” said Williams, “they’re irresistibly drawn to history’s worst people. Claiming they somehow skipped Hitler is rather like claiming seagulls collectively decided to avoid Blackpool for a few years.”

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