Man happy to believe any old bullshit as long as it confirms his existing biases
by Rich Smith 1 year ago 
In a stunning triumph for willful ignorance, local man Derek Williams has once again demonstrated his unwavering commitment to believing absolutely anything that confirms what he already believes.
Whether it’s a meme, a blurry screenshot, or a YouTube video narrated by someone calling themselves “TruthCrusader89,” Derek’s bar for credibility remains reassuringly subterranean.
“I just do my own research,” Derek explained, moments after confidently reposting an AI-generated image of a politician allegedly performing a satanic ritual involving Greggs sausage rolls.
“You can’t trust the mainstream media,” he added, citing a TikTok that used Comic Sans and an ominous soundtrack for credibility.
When asked how he verifies his information, Derek said he applies a strict test: if it confirms what he already believes to be true, then it’s true. “It’s called critical thinking,” he clarified, adjusting his tinfoil Wi-Fi deflector hat.
In the world of health, Derek’s discerning intellect has also served him well.
“Doctors don’t want you to know this,” he said, before swallowing a homemade ‘detox’ paste containing turmeric, toothpaste, and regret. “Big Pharma can’t profit from natural remedies,” he added, tapping his head and moments before Googling “can you overdose on cinnamon.”
Financially, Derek follows advice from self-proclaimed experts on Telegram who promise to “beat the system” by investing in an exciting new cryptocurrency represented by a frog meme. “The elites don’t want you to get rich, they want you to stay poor, this way I can build my wealth away from prying government eyes,” Derek added confidently, refreshing his wallet balance to confirm it was still zero.
Sociologists suggest Derek’s behaviour represents a wider trend; the comforting belief that truth is defined by whatever makes us feel smart and superior. Asked if that concerned him, Derek shook his head, explaining such a position is “fake news”.
Experts say this attitude could have dire consequences for society, however Derek has already labelled such experts as “nothing more than government shills who want the common man to live in ignorance”.
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