We should rebalance the economy back to manufacturing and making stuff, insist Americans who would never dream of working in a factory

author avatar by 2 years ago

A Trump-supporting Florida resident who’d never dream of doing anything but a desk job is adamant the American economy needs more manufacturing today.

Self-appointed economic expert Chuck Williams is perfectly happy to condemn others to manual toil to satisfy Trump’s dreams of what an economy ‘should’ look like.

“We should be making things in America,” he patiently explained whilst holding a nice cup of artisan coffee in his conspicuously callous-free hands that haven’t made a single f**king thing in his life.

“Manufacturing things like cars, clothes and other products is vital to the US, and it’s essential we open more factories so that other people can live lives of demanding labour that will see them dead by sixty-five,” he continued, blowing the steam off his mug to cool it.

“I once had a relative who worked in a factory in the seventies, so I do have working-class roots, you know. I speak with authority when I say Trump is right about making American MAKE things again.

“We need Americans back in factories. Not me personally though, other people. I’d be too expensive I think. I have other essential skills. Like spreadsheets. And meetings. I’m excellent at them.”

When asked, people who used to work in factories, spending all day on their feet making things, said that while some office jobs can sometimes utterly suck, they’re still miles better than spending ten hours a day on their feet like their grandad, thanks very much.

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