Rudy Giuliani applies for moral bankruptcy

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Saul Goodman’s dumber real-life equivalent, Rudy Giuliani, has today applied for moral bankruptcy after his application for financial bankruptcy failed to do anything about the vacuum where his soul should be.

The former Trump lawyer and professional conspiracy pusher applied for moral bankruptcy after discovering his morals in as much trouble as his finances.

Already facing a $148m bill for the defamation case he lost earlier in the week, it was decided he no longer has sufficient morals to navigate his current circumstances, and moral bankruptcy was his only option.

Moral Bankruptcy consultant Chuck Williams told us, “When your credit card is about as unreliable as your moral compass then you have to ask yourself if you’ve made the right life choices over the years.

“Financial bankruptcy happens to thousands of people every year, so we shouldn’t judge him too harshly for his financial situation, even if he’s spent the last few years representing some of the most dubious people on the planet – but moral bankruptcy is much harder to achieve and takes years of dedication to repellent ideas and deceiptful opinions.

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“I think one thing we can probably say with a high degree of confidence is that crime does not pay.

“Well, not well if your invoices are being paid by the Trump organisation, anyway.”

However, many observers have pointed out that in today’s society moral bankruptcy is no barrier to future success.

Political student Sharon Jameson told us, “The White House was recently inhabited by a man who has been declared bankrupt more times than he’s won elections – and he’s spent his entire adult life in a state of moral bankruptcy.

“So, if we’ve learned anything, it’s that unfortunately, Rudy is far from finished.”