Dreadful hate-filled spam-faced old misogynist of the year competition ends in a tie

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The Dreadful Hate-Filled Spam-Faced Horrible Old Misogynist of the Year competition has ended in a dramatic tie.

The competition, which sees the most dreadful hate-filled spam-faced horrible old misogynists compete online to be named Dreadful Hate-Filled Spam-Faced Horrible Old Misogynist of the Year, has attracted a dazzling array of entrants from the ‘entertainment’ and ‘journalism’ sectors who have all spent the entire year vomiting out odious nonsense about whatever women has most recently threatened their staggeringly frail sense of their own masculinity.

The competition ended last week with a special round in which competitors were asked to season their misogynistic ramblings with thinly-veiled racism. Something they all seemed to enjoy.

“This year’s competition has been an absolute festival of bile-filled misogyny, one of the best I can remember,” chuckled Simon Williams, head of the Dreadful Hate-Filled Spam-Faced Horrible Old Misogynist Society, who sponsor the competition.

“There are a great many famous misogynists who have devoted their lives to managing their deep-rooted terror of women by posting odious bilge about what they’d like to do to various prominent women, and they’ve really set the competition alight this year. But I think what’s important to recognise this is the huge number of amateur dreadful hate-filled spam-faced horrible old misogynists who have been inspired by the professionals to make a really impressive showing in the competition.

“I don’t think it’s possible to pick between any of the competitors, and so I think the fairest result is a tie, and let’s all look forward to next year’s competition and another sea of dreadful hate-filled misogyny.”

The result means that all competitors will share the coveted trophy of an incredibly tiny gold penis.