by 
Boris Johnson is holidaying in typically British fashion.
The alleged Prime Minister took a vital holiday in the midst of multiple crises for Britain, accompanied by <insert name of current wife> and a few of his seven or eight children.
Mr Johnson has stayed true to the values of his support base by refusing to speak any Spanish and demanding a British fry-up regardless of whether the hotel restaurant offers it on the menu or not.
“CHIPS!” demanded Johnson, of a beleaguered server at Casa Del Lagerlout.
“Yes sir, we have chips, and my English is actually quite good-”
“CHIPS…AND…A…PINT…PLEASE…PEDRO!” continued Johnson.
“…yes sir, very good. I’ll be right back,” sighed the waiter.
Rounding a corner, the waiter confided, “My name is Antonio, my English is perfect, and I hate it here.
“This one is your Prime Minister, is he? That explains a LOT. All of you are like this.”
Boris Johnson commented, “What’s he saying? Can’t understand a word, to be honest.”
