Monday 26 July 2021

‘Bronze is nothing to celebrate’, insists man who threw a party when his book was 9th in the best-sellers list


Piers Morgan celebrating book being 9th

Piers Morgan has today diminished the achievements of bronze medalists at the Olympic games, insisting no one should celebrate coming 3rd, despite throwing a party when his book scraped in the top 10 best-sellers.

Morgan, who can be found on social media every day having terrible opinions about a wide range of subjects, seems to think it is embarrassing to celebrate third place, while also popping open the champaign for being 9th.

He told his followers, “What’s the point of Bronze? Why celebrate that at all? You’re not winning anything, no one remembers a third-place finisher, so anyone showing off a bronze medal should be embarrassed. I feel embarrassed for them.”

However, those who were unable to attend Morgan’s impromptu party for seeing his book place 9th in the best-sellers list, insist they probably got off lightly.

Acquaintance Simon Williams told us, “I’m sure there was lots of talk about how the eight books ahead of him were only there because the establishment was keeping him down, or that too many woke people were still out there buying books simply to deny him glory.

“He then probably went on to insist Arsenal are still the greatest club in the country, despite finishing 8th last season.”

However, despite the criticism, Morgan concluded, “If you’re looking for me to take a public position that isn’t ragingly hypocritical, then I’m afraid you’ll have a very long time to wait.

“Hypocrisy keeps people talking about me, which is the main thing, and it keeps alive the dream of my own prime-time show on GB News.”

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