Friday 4 June 2021 by Chris Ballard

Holiday options narrow to Swansea or Falkland Islands


Swansea holidays

As the UK puts more countries on its Red and Amber lists, only damp, bleak places remain as possible holiday destinations.

After over a year stuck at home, Simon Williams is desperately searching for a nice summer holiday for his family.

“My wife and I have been working really hard and our daughter will be taking her GCSEs next year – we just all need a little break, just for a week or two,” said Simon.

“But with travel options increasingly limited, everywhere in the UK has been booked up for the summer. Well, everywhere except Swansea, which is understandable.

“And the Green list of countries now appears to be down to Australia – which we can’t really afford – and the Falkland Islands.

“So basically, if we want a change of scenery we have to go to a grey, depressing place with shitty weather and where there’s not much to do except visit sheep farms.

“Although very similar resorts, Swansea and the Falklands do have various pros and cons. For example, the Falklands is an expensive flight away while Swansea is in Wales.

“The Falklands it is then.”

In further bad news for Simon, the Falklands have now been placed on the Red list after news that Prince Andrew was planning a visit to commemorate those he fought alongside.

The foreign office has therefore advised families with teenage girls against all but essential travel.

So will Simon be taking his family to Swansea?

“Oh bloody hell!” said Simon. “I suppose we could always just sit in the garden and stick forks in our legs – it’ll make a change, at least.”

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