Zombies at the door would like to talk to you about voting Democrat

author avatar by 3 years ago

A smartly-dressed pair of the walking dead at the door want to know if you’ve considered voting Democrat.

Brandishing a cheerfully-coloured pamphlet titled “Biden/Harris”, the zombies are very keen to share the benefits of joining the party, saying the party is ‘the only choice’ for the discerning recently-deceased voter.

Continuing their theme, the zombies confirmed that the party holds no discrimination or prejudice, and absolutely anyone is welcome in their number so long as they shamble along in a straight line with only periodic breaks to loot a Footlocker.

“This time last month I was quite literally falling apart,” said one whilst trying to reattach an arm.

“I never thought I’d get to exercise my God-given right of voting again, largely because I died in 1998.

“But since I became a registered democrat I’ve been filled with new life, at least until January 30th. Doesn’t that sound great?

“If you don’t want to vote for us now, don’t worry, we’ll wait.”