Monday 28 September 2020 by Davywavy

Bilbo Baggins fined 10,000 gold coins for having 13 dwarfs to a party at his home


Hobbiton party sees fine for Bilbo Baggins

Local hobbit Bilbo Baggins has told magistrates that the party in his home last week was ‘completely unexpected’ and not his fault, according to court reports.

Baggins, who was arrested last week for breaching lockdown regulations, was told that as many as five dwarfs and him would be acceptable under the new rules, but such a large breach of the rules justified the maximum fine.

“I didn’t even invite those dwarfs”, said Mr Baggins, 50, instead insisting they had received invitations from a ‘mysterious wizard’ – a claim which caused police to search him for large quantities of pipe-weed.

However, he went on to ask the court to order him not to leave the Shire as that’s all he really wanted in the first place.

Jurors rejected the defendants claim that the contents of his well-stocked larder and pantry were all for him, reasoning that such a large amount of food indicated he was expecting guests – unless the hobbits were incredibly greedy.

When told he was being fined 10,000 gold coins, Baggin told the court, “Where am I going to get that sort of money from? I’d have to kill a dragon or something,” before saying he’d be right back as he’d just got to go on an adventure.

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